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Blog - BDSM Box

Play is the first kink lifestyle brand.

Filtering by Tag: submission

Findomme Days, or, Redistribution of Wealth is Kinky

Sasha Sobolevsky

When I got the suggestion to write about financial domination for this blog, I was in between jobs, looking for anything that would reward a hard day’s work properly, and I have to admit that my first reaction was, “I could get into that!” Having someone at your beck and call whose only demand is that they be allowed to give you outlandish sums of money, then get off to the guilt they feel later — what could be the downside?

Woman sitting at a computer

Obviously, it’s not that simple — financial domination requires a business-savvy cultivation of a personality that’s so compelling, people don’t even need to talk to you before they want to send you money. That’s not easy to come by, and takes full-time-career-level dedication.

Just ask Mistress Harley, one of the financial dominatrixes interviewed by the Washington Post in a 2018 profile of the industry. She hosts one of her clients in her house full-time, and he pays her a salary to dominate him 24/7. This is all above-board, and there are thorough legal documents involved to make sure neither person can take advantage of the other.

Notably, all the clients featured in the Post article are rich men, and the findommes are keenly aware there is a redistributive aspect to the arrangement. Goddess Venus knows that her clients “own all the wealth in the world. We should be gouging them. A lot of women just see it as a job. I see it as wealth redistribution.”

But maybe the most important thing to understand about financial domination is that it takes the D/s relationship out of the bedroom in a real, tangible way. This makes it both potentially riskier and, due to the higher stakes, hotter. In this end-of-days capitalist landscape, no paddle hits harder than a blow to the finances.

Mx C

Racial and Social Problematic Elements of BDSM

Sasha Sobolevsky

I have many times considered society's role in my being a woman who is a BDSM submissive. Sometimes it really upsets me but overall, I accept that it makes me happy, and I wouldn't like to live my life any other way. As long as I am safe, sane, and the activities I participate in are consensual, I am ok with it.

I have recently also been considering the problematic racial dynamics within BDSM. This is a harder for me to contend with. I am a white woman, and I won't pretend to approach that I understand the ramifications. Instead, I will let the words of others stand in where I have none of my own. Please take a look at the following articles. As the US is currently undergoing a reckoning, I believe that BDSM is not free from the race and gender issues that plague the country, and the world. I don’t know what to do about it, but I know that we need to continue talking about it.

With love,